My one wish in this world is for more women to be nicer to and about one another. I am lucky enough to have a circle of friends who lift one another up and never insult or criticize one another and not even behind our backs. We appreciate each other’s unique beauty and set of talents and applaud one another for any and all accomplishments. I love these ladies and can’t imagine life without them.
I think that because I have a very loving circle of friends that I am hyper aware of negative or toxic women. I never look at another woman and list her flaws. Why? I don’t know her and who really cares what her flaws are. I would rather know what her spark is. I judge women on their heart and avoid the others.
Not sure when little girls changed from ‘sugar and spice and everything nice’ to such negative and judgmental women? But I am sure there are so many factors that it’s a real challenge to stay on the kind side of this battle. Put aside bad childhood behavior because we are adults now and cannot be locked inside that little girl who wanted to fit in or was the target herself. Those experiences should be what make us want to stand up against negative judgements not allow them to be part of you now.
So if you see someone and your mind moves to a negative judgement please think of something nice about that person. Keep doing it until its natural. Then when you are ready, try voicing that compliment to that person out loud. It feels wonderful and I’m sure that other person would love to hear kindness as well.
Now let’s add another layer to this. Even if you see the beauty in others I bet your own inner voice can be pretty judgmental. Try that same trick on yourself. When you look in the mirror or say or do something and your inner voice says something negative, stop yourself and say something positive. This is a long process and worth the time. I am happy to say that I learned this trick way back in my mid-twenties (taught to me by a male friend of mine). It takes practice but you listen to what you say about yourself and you always believe it. I think that my positive inner voice helped me be aware of allowing people in my life that are like minded vs toxic people who will bring me down.
Because in the end…I do want to be sweet & kind and everything nice.